Cookie,
I know that even though you have to go, you are not really gone.
I know this because I see you in places you’ve never been. I see you strut when I look at tall grass bending in the wind. I hear your gravelly meow in the crunch of rocks under my boots. Your purr is ever present in the sounds of the wild when I turn my engine off late at night.
I think I’ll always look for you when I sit down on the couch, even when I know you aren’t lounging on it anymore. I think I’ll see you in the birds once you’re gone, because even though you weren’t born with wings, you perfectly captured their ageless freedom in everything you do.
I believe that I’ll find you in the rivers that I hike to, hours and miles away, crystal clear blue hues whose depth could never compete with that found in your eyes. I know that I’ll find you in the mountains, where the breeze prances like a youthful soul, curling coyly around your mane while you watch me explore. You will exist in the valleys, scratching your claws on mountains. I will continue to see you in the sun, which could only dream of shining as bright as you. But that doesn’t mean I don’t see you in the quiet rumble of thunder, a sound as commanding as you.
I’ll continue to hear the soft pitter-patter of your paws as you strut through the house for years to come. When I look at a pair of heels, you will be curled in my mind as I try to emulate the effortless grace you were born with. I will see you in footwear, in blankets, in chairs, in everything that you once claimed as yours. I hear you in sad songs and happy songs, in the sound of crickets and the splash of water. You are everywhere when I care to listen. You are in dragonflies and butterflies, in trees and brush. I feel you in silk and cashmere, in the luxury of a life well lived. I think of you when I see bright bouquets and feel the delicate smell of the wild tickle my nose.
I see you in the smiles of the people I love; I hear you in their laughter every single day. I know that even if I can’t hold you in my arms anymore, I will continue to hold you in my heart every day until I too have to leave. I see you everywhere I look, and I know I’ll only see you more from here on. It’s okay to leave; I know that you’re ready. And as much as it hurts, I know that no matter what, you aren’t really gone.
Author: Lauren Slade